First-Person Accounts
Nobody can better describe living with an Asperger profile than those who live the experience every day. At AANE, we deeply value the unique perspectives and voices of those we serve and hope that their personal stories can help to foster understanding, generate empathy, bolster respect, and build connection within our communities. These irreplaceable first-person accounts will enhance your understanding of the gifts and challenges of those with Asperger profiles and the strategies that help them to succeed.
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Three Worlds: Long Night’s Journey Into Day
02/02/2021
As AANE celebrates its 25th year, we are highlighting key moments and contributions. In 2017, AANE held the conference Aging with Aspergers, which explored the unique issues those on the spectrum face as they age. At this conference, community member Mark Goodman shared this moving story of growing... more
As an adult living with a late autism spectrum diagnosis, I have come to view my life up to now as embodying three phases: partially informed, enlightened, and paying it forward.
I refer to the first stage of my life as "partially informed" because I was aware of my learning disability but not... more
Self-esteem continues to be an important topic for those on the autism spectrum. AANE community member Sam Farmer reflects on the way in which his expectations of others have shifted over the years and how this positive change has helped strengthen his self-esteem.
To read more about Sam, including his new book, go to:... more
... more
Two Poems
Article
by Nomi Kaim
Instructions for Later Years
Write a terrible poem.
Go ahead. Do it.
Write it in broken
stanzas, or maybe none at all.
Write it as though you had never lost your voice.
Write it as if the truly pitiful, deeply inadequate words you have now
are the only words you... more
Aspie Dad, Spectrum Son
06/15/2018
What an experience this has been! Fatherhood in this day and age is no easy undertaking regardless and who is or isn’t on the Spectrum. Take it up a notch when both father and son have Spectrum profiles. Without question, I am in the thick of the greatest challenge of my life, though the word... more
In this webinar, Steven will teach you about the basics of undue influence, and why individuals on the autism spectrum are uniquely susceptible to it. He will explain the difference between healthy and unhealthy influence. Undue influence is not just an issue for religious cults; it is used by... more
Destroyer
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
1944 - 1945
I was a lonely kid bereft of meaningful interactions with everyone including siblings and even parents to a large extent. We had fled a big, grimy industrial city in the Midwest and moved... more
High School
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
1948 - 1952
One
Sequoia High was a large, two-story quadrangle constructed in 1927. Each of its eight hallways, four on the ground floor, four on the second, had to be about eighty feet long. Numerous... more
Lick Observatory
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
Late Summer, 1946
Though the sun was half an hour from slipping behind the distant mountains to the west, it was still hot. My mother, and I having just turned thirteen, were waiting at the bus depot... more
Lights Out
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
1944, Grammar School
Two burly maintenance men tramped into the classroom, glanced about and quickly got down to business.
Number one proceeded to examine an electrical outlet on the wall. He held... more
Magic Coil vs. School
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
1943 - 1946
On the fifteenth of May, 1943, when I was not quite ten our family moved into a summer cottage in the then-rural hamlet of Woodside, situated about thirty five tortuous miles south of San... more
Over and Out
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
Late 1940’s to mid 1950’s
Mom told me the first word I uttered, at nearly four years of age, was “ra-yo”, for radio. The console in the living room, bigger and taller than I, allured and... more
Bombs Away!
Article
This is part of an 8-part series about growing up with Asperger's in a different era.
1944 - 1945
Europe and Asia were in flames. Russia and much of Europe were engaged in fighting for their lives against the juggernaut of Nazi Germany controlled by a madman backed by platoons of... more
Welcome to the World
Article
What’s it like, growing up different from everyone else? Not different in the way we’re all different from one other, but different in a way that goes beyond. Different from family members setting you apart, wracked by feelings of alienation in school, on the job, doubly so in the Military... more
Is This For Real?
Article
Is This For Real? That is, did the events depicted in these eight narratives actually occur?
Yes, bizarre as it may seem today.
Imagine, if you will, a young boy forced to find his way in a strange new world, bewildered by every step he takes, steps without guidance, steps fraught with... more
Creating my Own Self-Esteem
Article
I am a 53 year old woman with mild Asperger’s. My self- esteem is a constant struggle since I have never found a group that I could belong to. Most of my family cut ties with me after my mother died almost twenty years ago. She was the only person who understood me and would advise me on how to act ' human'. Without her, I have been sort of lost... more
Ham Radio Saved My Life
Article
There is a popular predictor of future personal disaster that you may have heard of, it’s called the Adverse Childhood Experiences scale, and the idea is there are specific bad things that might happen in your childhood, such as seeing your mother try to commit suicide -- seriously bad stuff -- and if you’ve had – the more of these you’ve... more
Never Be Ashamed of Who You Are
Article
My name is Michelle Donnelly and I was diagnosed with Executive Functioning Disorder. Growing up with Executive Functioning Disorder was not easy especially since I was not willing to accept the fact I had it. I just wanted to be like everyone else without the struggles and accommodations. "Normal" was the term I used often, " I just want to be... more
Art and Asperger’s
Article
Living with Asperger's is not an easy feat. It never is. Imagine yourself in a room full of people. All of those people are laughing and mingling. Meanwhile, you aren’t. You’re sitting there in the corner all alone, watching everyone make nice with each other. Nobody doesn’t even acknowledge that you’re there. You just sit there, crushed... more
“What? I am Autistic?”
Article
I was sixty years old, married for thirty four years, and had two grown children; I was making my living as a Comedian on a Cruise ship AND I had no idea I was on the spectrum.
After a show two Professional Therapists (A husband wife team) who worked for a school system as both a diagnostic team and a therapeutic team, came up to me after a... more
Path to an Independent Life
Article
My name is Joseph Berry. When I was three years old I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. When I was eleven, I realized that something was different about me. I had social challenges and needed extra support in school. I was fortunate to be on a series of strong IEPs from age 3 to 20. My education largely centered on applied behavioral... more
It is often thought of that depression is more of a seducer while anxiety is a guerrilla ambush, attacking you when you least expect it in times where you feel nothing could go wrong. And in the vanguard, stands your inner critic, looking like something out of Mad Max Fury Road. In addition to being a looming presence that just wants to rain on... more
My Diagnosis
Article
I have always known I was different from everyone else. I see things in black and white and there is no gray area for me. From ten to twenty-seven years of age I felt out of place as if I didn’t belong. I have always had a few close friends but it’s hard for me to make friends or be in social situations. I always felt awkward and didn’t know... more
Asperger’s People Parenting
Article
Hello, I am G. Edward Hudson (formerly known as Gary E. Hudson). I have been an AANE member for some time now. I found out I was an Aspie when I was 57 but the Massachusetts Commonwealth Care system back then did not support any doctors who would do a diagnosis. I got one, however, in 2012. I am one of the founders of the AANE Artists... more
Untitled
Article
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood …”
Perhaps the event with the greatest impact on my self-esteem was in July of 2015 when a visit to the AANE offices confirmed my suspicion that I had Asperger’s. This the summer of my sixty-ninth year on the planet Earth. Heretofore I was not even sure I belong on planet Earth, or anywhere else for... more
StrangeFit
Article
April 27th, 2017, will be probably the biggest day of my life. I hurt myself at work, I am a 52 year old male in construction, and it has led to a domino of effects. It completely hurt me physically but it changed the way my daily routine goes, if you have ASD that can and will rock your world. In the same light it has given me time to find some... more
Perfectly Flawed
Article
How many of us have ever felt buried? In work, emotions, thoughts, situations, stressors, hopes and dreams or sometimes defeat...? We live in a bustling society that easily buries us in bills, emails, expectations, insecurities, demands on our time and emotional responses. Those times I felt my most buried was when I'd run further into myself and... more
In this presentation I am going to address the issue of how running, and being part of a specific community of committed, passionate runners has bolstered my self-esteem and enabled me to become a more socially centered person.
The foundation for much of my self-esteem rests upon two pillars that draw from specific talents with which I have... more
Why Bother?
Article
I'm 65 years old. I've spent most of my life feeling alone and different, and not understanding why.
I had hoped my autism diagnosis two years ago would change everything for the better. It didn't, at least not in the way I expected. No surprise that answers aren't always solutions.
The good news is that I now understand my head-banging... more
The Me Between the Lines
Article
Why, in my mid-thirties, did it become essential for me to get the neuro-psych evaluation that determined I am on the autism spectrum? Two lines.
Let me explain.
My entire life I felt like a foreigner in a strange world. My father joked he was from Jupiter and I believed maybe the same... more
I Believed I Could, So I Did
Article
I don’t understand why, as a society, we tell young children to believe in themselves more than we tell anyone else. Don’t get me wrong, children need encouragement; I just don’t think they need as much as they’re getting compared to the rest of us, because it’s not until we get older that we stop believing in ourselves so much. That... more
The Aspie In the Mirror
Article
My journey to self-discovery was so long. I had been working as a psychotherapist for thirty years. I had raised an autistic child to adulthood. I had read countless autism books and been to numerous autism conferences with my wife, Kristina. I was feeling pretty good about my accomplishments.
And then we heard Sarah Hendrickx.
As you may... more
The Light
Article
Adolescence blacked me out. As a child, I burned with an inextinguishable light, but things changed, as things do. I was homeless at fifteen and working full time by sixteen. I worked at my cousin’s tire shop and lived in an 8’ x 10’ shed next to the shop. I went to school on Friday and made up for missing the work day by working on... more
Hiding in Plain Sight: In Our Own Words
Recommended Reading
Women with Asperger/Autism Profiles Share their Life Stories
These twenty stories were sent to AANE in preparation for the March conference regarding women on the Autism Spectrum. Six of these stories were presented at the conference itself; the rest are now being shared for the very first... more
Susan Shanfield wrote and presented this talk at AANE’s Celebration of Community on March 7, 2004.
Hi Everyone. What an amazing experience that we women and girls are gathered here together to celebrate our strengths and differences—and I think that we’re making history at the same time.... more
Turn Down the Volume
Article
Sometimes going to the mall can be hard. Like one time, when I was in a store, the mall alarm went off. I lost it. I had to find a place to sit and cover my ears tight.
The noise rips through my body. The pain is unreal! I lose touch with what is going on. After the noise stops, it takes only a few minutes to pull myself together, but it can... more
Until December 2006 when Dr. Miles Tarter evaluated me, I never knew for sure that I had Asperger Syndrome—but now a lot of things make more sense to me. Many neurotypicals, when discussing Asperger Syndrome, tend to dwell on the negative. As a developmental disability, a form of high functioning autism, AS does have a downside. However, I... more
I am a Survivor
Article
I am a survivor.
As a problem child I did not speak until I was four, spent two chaotic years in Kindergarten, an extra year glued to grade 6. In 1946, when I was twelve, my mother took me to Stanford University for an evaluation. The psychologist who examined me declared nothing was wrong, that I would likely outgrow whatever was troubling... more
Married, with Asperger’s
Article
He’s finally trained! My husband of 26 years has scarcely completed a single one of my sentences all this year. Like most neurotypical people, Christopher has a tendency to want to finish someone’s sentence when there is a pause. That is not helpful for me!
I received my diagnosis of... more
Elisabeth’s Story
Article
Elizabeth Avery was born in 1965 in Mineola, New York (on Long Island), but grew up in Kentucky. Her father was from England, and her mother from Germany. She had a younger sister and a younger brother. Elizabeth knew from early childhood that she was in some way different from other children in... more
My name is Rick Chefitz and I have a relatively unknown learning disorder called Nonverbal Learning Disorder. I also have been given a diagnosis of Asperger's Disorder. Admitting that there is problem is the first step in a long journey of self-discovery, of becoming the best person that I can be. It has been a long road, but at least the 33-year... more
David
Article
David likes to make people laugh: he performs a very convincing imitation of Dustin Hoffman’s deadpan delivery in the classic Hollywood film “Rainman.” “Rainman,” in fact, provided David’s only image of an autistic person when, three years ago, he learned that he had “symptoms consistent with Asperger’s Syndrome.”
His... more
Bruce Carley’s Story
Article
Bruce Carley shares the view of many that his story is inspirational, although he prefers not to see it overblown. Bruce has an absolute acceptance of himself, his talents and his interests. He is himself, a uniquely talented individual who frankly states his opposition to the notion that people should be labeled, compared or steered into any... more
Michelle Knight’s Story
Article
Michelle related her inspiring story to me in a Starbuck’s in Belmont. We meet here at her suggestion. Michelle is giving up her Saturday morning and driving in from her home in Acton to tell her story. This in itself seems to me remarkable for this shy, unpretentious, youthful-looking woman. However, Michelle is a goal setter, who sets her... more
This article is the outline of a talk Stephanie Geheran prepared and delivered at a meeting of the Pathways Parent-Faculty Program at Brookline High School. Their mission is to educate, inform, support, and help students, parents, and faculty to prepare for and make smoother transitions from the K-8 schools to the high school.
Steph also... more
The Difference Inside Me
Article
Throughout my life it has been a struggle everyday to find that one point, where I could feel comfortable and pleased with myself. Where I would know the functions of the world and who I truly am as person, and be “normal.” Though I have never reached that point yet, I have a lot to show you about the life of someone who has Asperger’s, so... more
Hi, my name’s Aaron Levinger. I’m twenty-one years old, and I was first diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, or AS, in middle school – maybe around seventh grade. I want to tell you a little about my experience.
Today you’ve heard a little about Autism Spectrum Disorders such as AS. You might be wondering what causes them. Nobody knows... more
Learning to Love Yourself
02/02/2017
As somebody who has lived with Asperger’s Syndrome for almost 48 years, I have experienced more than my share of trials and tribulations. I have been bullied, both physically and verbally, more times than I can recall. I have heard people say unsavory things about me and ridicule me to my face... more
The Self-Discovery of One Aspie Woman
11/09/2016
I had always thought of myself as a sensitive and independent introvert who had found her way after an anxious and lonely childhood. When I hit 40 years old, something shifted – so many of my peers had reached the traditional milestones of marriage, children, home buying, etc., none of which I... more
A Spectrum Son’s Tribute to His Mom
10/26/2016
On September 1, 2016, my Mom lost her long, hard-fought battle with dementia and passed away to what I hope is a better place than where she was during the final years of her life. If she is where I hope she is, it is very well-deserved by virtue of the kind of person she was, how she touched so... more
Christian Tsetsos
Video
Christian shares what school was like for him growing up with Asperger... more
The AANE Community
Video
The AANE community share their... more
Gina and Kate Gallagher share their experience with... more
In Our Own Words
Video
Adults with Asperger profiles talk about their experiences and... more
Parallel Play Book Talk
Video
Tim Page, author of Parallel Play, discusses growing up with Asperger Syndrome and making his way in the... more
Reuben and his family talk about what it's like living with an Asperger... more
David Levitan shares what it's like growing up with sensory... more
Adults share their experiences of growing up and living with Asperger profiles.
Part 1
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Part 4 (This... more
Adults share their experiences of growing up and living with Asperger profiles.
Part 1 (This Video)
Part 2
Part 3
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Adults share their experiences of growing up and living with Asperger profiles.
Part 1
Part 2 (This Video)
Part 3
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Adults share their experiences of growing up and living with Asperger profiles.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3 (This Video)
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Beyond the Wall: Personal Experiences with Autism and Asperger Syndrome, Second Edition
Recommended Reading
Author, Educator, Musician, Internationally acclaimed speaker and autistic adult offers so much more than the traditional autobiography. Drawing on personal and professional experience, Stephen Shore combines three voices to create a touching and, at the same time, highly informative book for... more
Autism-Asperger’s and Sexuality: Puberty and Beyond
Recommended Reading
Many people on the spectrum never get "the talk" from their parents, and suffer from "information deficit." This book goes a long way toward filling in the gaps in their knowledge. It takes a candid look at aspects of sex and relationships as they apply to people on the autism spectrum:
Learn... more
Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger’s
Recommended Reading
Ever since he was young, John Robison longed to connect with other people, but by the time he was a teenager, his odd habits—an inclination to blurt out non sequiturs, avoid eye contact, dismantle radios, and dig five-foot holes (and stick his younger brother, Augusten Burroughs, in them)—had... more
Parallel Play
Recommended Reading
In 1997, Tim Page won the Pulitzer Prize for Criticism for his work as the chief classical music critic of The Washington Post, work that the Pulitzer board called “lucid and illuminating.” Three years later, at the age of 45, he was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome–a form of autism... more
Elijah’s Cup: A Family’s Journey into the Community and Culture of High Functioning Autism and…
Recommended Reading
In Elijah's Cup, Paradiz tells the powerful story of her family's struggle with her son's condition, one characterized by social awkwardness, literal-mindedness, and a fixation with particular subjects and interests.
Elijah's Cup offers a refreshing take on autism from the perspective of civil... more
The Autism Spectrum and Depression
Recommended Reading
For people with Autism profiles, the stresses of coping with a world that seems alien to them can often lead to depression.. Written specifically for adults, this ground-breaking book offers accessible and sensitive advice on how to manage depression and make positive steps towards recovery. Nick... more
Asperger’s From the Inside-Out
Recommended Reading
Michael John Carley was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome at thirty-six-when his young son received the same diagnosis. This fascinating book reveals his personal experience with the confusion associated with this condition-and offers insights into living an independent and productive life.
Former... more
The Complete Guide to Getting a Job for People with Asperger Syndrome: Find the Right…
Recommended Reading
Finding a job is a confusing and anxiety-provoking process for many individuals with Asperger's Syndrome. This practical “how-to” guide describes exactly what it takes to get hired in the neurotypical workplace. Every aspect of finding employment is covered, from defining strengths and... more
Developing Talents and Careers for Individuals with Asperger Syndrome and High Functioning Autism
Recommended Reading
The authors take an in-depth look at entrepreneurship. Using real-life examples, they point out that many of the unique characteristics of individuals on the autism spectrum that lend themselves well to entrepreneurial ventures. The book explores many unnoticed aspects of Vocational Rehabilitation... more
How to Find Work that Works for People with Asperger Syndrome
Recommended Reading
The Ultimate Guide for Getting People with Asperger Syndrome into the Workplace (and keeping them there!)
Hawkins guides readers through the process of gaining employment, from building a supportive team, addressing workplace challenges, to securing an appropriate post. The book includes practical... more
Asperger’s on the Job: Must-Have Advice for People with Asperger’s or High Functioning Autism and…
Recommended Reading
Up to 85% of the Asperger's population are without full-time employment, though many have above-average intelligence.
Rudy Simone, an adult with Asperger's Syndrome and an accomplished author, consultant, and musician, created this insightful resource to help employers, educators, and therapists... more
June 22, 2016 From the National LGBTQ Taskforce Blog
tags: autistic, genderqueer, health care, LGBTQ, mental health, trans
I’m an autistic activist deeply invested in queer politics, and I’ve managed to fumble my way around without ever developing a conventional understanding of gender.... more
Married, with Asperger’s
Article
He’s finally trained! My husband of 26 years has scarcely completed a single one of my sentences all this year. Like most neurotypical people, Christopher has a tendency to want to finish someone’s sentence when there is a pause. That is not helpful for me!
I received my diagnosis of... more
On the Transition to Adulthood
Article
As I look back on my teenage years and early twenties, some themes emerge in my transition to adulthood. I gradually took on more and more responsibility for my own welfare. Because it was gradual, I never felt overwhelmed. I was also able to get advice from others to help me at various points. This advice helped me immensely. Unfortunately, there... more
In the year 2002, when I was seventy-one years old, I read a book review in the Times Literary Supplement (London). The author of the biography under review speculated that his subject might have suffered from Asperger’s. I recognized that the symptoms enumerated also applied to me. After further research, it seemed intuitively obvious to me... more
Asperger Syndrome Employment Workbook
Recommended Reading
This practical manual will enable people diagnosed with AS and high functioning autism to deepen their understanding and appreciate their value as working individuals. Through step-by-step self assessment, the reader is encouraged to engage actively in a self paced exploration of their employment... more
Asperger Syndrome and Anxiety: A Guide to Successful Stress Management
Recommended Reading
Many people suffer from feelings of stress and anxiety in their everyday lives. For people with Asperger Syndrome (AS), this stress can be particularly difficult to manage. On a daily basis people with AS must fit into a world that seems totally foreign to them and this can increase feelings of... more
Ask and Tell: Self-Advocacy and Disclosure for People on the Autism Spectrum
Recommended Reading
Edited by Stephen Shore, Ask and Tell aims to help autistic people effectively self-advocate in their pursuit of independent, productive, and fulfilling lives. Ask and Tell is unique by being the first book to speak to the twin issues of self-advocacy and disclosure for people on the... more
Aspergirls: Empowering Females with Asperger Syndrome
Recommended Reading
Girls with Asperger/Autism profiles are less frequently diagnosed than boys, and even once symptoms have been recognized, help is often not readily available. The image of coping well presented by AS females of any age can often mask difficulties, deficits, challenges, and loneliness. This is a... more
Journal of Best Practices: A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man’s Quest to…
Recommended Reading
At some point in nearly every marriage, a wife finds herself asking, What the @#!% is wrong with my husband?! In David Finch’s case, this turns out to be an apt question. Five years after he married Kristen, the love of his life, they learn that he has Asperger syndrome. The diagnosis explains... more
Review of NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity by Steve Silberman
Article
NeuroTribes by Steve Silberman is, to put it in the simplest terms, the definitive history of scientific and popular knowledge of Autism in the western world. After a brief introduction detailing how Silberman became involved with journalistic accounts of autistic people and the scientific studies pertaining to them, the book opens with a... more
Don’t Mourn for Us
Article
This article was published in the Autism Network International newsletter, Our Voice, Volume 1, Number 3, 1993. It is an outline of the presentation Jim gave at the 1993 International Conference on Autism in Toronto, and is addressed primarily to parents.
Parents often report that learning their child is autistic was the most... more