The developmental stage children are going through and their Asperger profile impact their behavior. The frustration parents and kids often feel about behavior boils down to expectations and assumptions about what causes confusing behavior. If you believe your child is doing something that is socially unacceptable intentionally, it’s hard to stay calm, step back, and take time to think about trying different strategies. But if you understand that your child’s behavior is likely the result of an underdeveloped skill or difficulty interpreting the situation, it is easier to respond with patience and compassion.
Many parents feel conflicted about the cause of their child’s behavioral challenges. They wonder if they are letting their child off the hook if they don’t respond with a strong consequence or punishment. But we have to remember that our children and teens are expending greater effort to try to understand and respond to the complex social situations they encounter. We need to interpret their behavior through an Asperger/Autism lens so that we can learn how to help them manage the strong emotions they experience and cope with frustration and change.